The Last Gargoyle - Installment 4

   The vodka erased the pounding in my temples and cleared things up a bit. Nothing improved after that first encounter. Gary had gained a friend while I obsessed with evening the score; how does one live with the fact an ignoramus got the better of him? 

    Week after week I’d be confronted with all things Gary. I mean the tard couldn’t let it be. Last thing on my mind would be good old Gary and then he’d get to following me around telling everyone we were buddies. I wasn’t sure if I was embarrassed or pissed but the heat would roll off my forehead. There was no shaking Gary so the best I could do is hide behind a wall of laughter. Problem was, the more I laughed the more I hated myself. I knew I was nothing but a limp dick. News would be on in the cafeteria and I’d watch it downing a sub sandwich. Seemed like about every day there’d be a story about a shooting somewhere; left me wondering why Gary couldn’t be on the wrong end of a gun. Put him out of his misery and help me some with my state of mind. If I didn’t have vodka, I’m serious here, I’d’ve never made it.

Iran and a Frustrated North Korea

Iran backed group fires on base killing three. North Korea dumps more missiles in the sea. The world community barely takes notice. Man, these Dictators gotta be frustrated.

This Advice from Valencia Spain

Essentially what he said in reply to your email (which somehow went to your blog) with the Coronavirus raging, stay calm, open a beer and read a Curt Rude book.

Agreed!

Women's Rights - Not

Enough said?

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Coronavirus + The #IceCreamChallenge = Going Viral with a Virus

Young folks looking for Warhol's 15 minutes of fame by licking and putting Ice Cream back on the shelf - Right? I guess D'Adrien L'Quinn Anderson did it looking for FB Friends. Is this what Dale Carnegie had in mind when he wrote How to Win Friends?

                           

Coronavirus + Corona Beer = Beer Drinkers to The Rescue

Guess 38% of Americans were shying away from drinking Corona because of the Virus. Talk Show Hosts and what not have gotten the word out and actually sales have increased 5%. Many Thanks go out to The Beer Drinkers of America! Click&Read

Hiawatha Book Minders Association

Many thanks for the invitation to present at this get together in Onalaska Wisconsin. If you please I will present at 11:15. Very much open for questions so bring them in spades. Will have a hundred copies of 'JusThis' and 'Brand of Justice'. My agent, Ms Barone is currently shopping 'The Passionate Jihadist' thus no copies available. Checkout my short story 'The Bee Killer' if ya have a couple of minutes to kill. You can find it by clicking this link!  Click & Read

Now This is a Healthcare Crisis

Stupid is as Stupid does.

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The Last Gargoyle - Installment #3

     So how in the hell did this happen in the first place? Everyone parties the night before the first day of classes. We partied, I won a contest and … okay … stayed up all night. My frat even toasted me with beer bongs. I was the man of the hour and won the ‘Hogger Contest’. My brothers called my date a Hog-o-rilla. It was just a ‘fun and games’ play on words. We all knew a boar hog could never screw a gorilla and produce my date. I think her name was Sally and she was butt ugly. I got paid the pot because, through no fault of mine, she heard the laughing and comments and stormed off before I could kiss her and collect the cash. So I’m not sure if it was the partying or not, but I couldn’t find my art lab. My fraternity is known for being responsible so we all pledged to make it to class either puking or half asleep. So all I want to do is make it to class and set in the back nursing a sever hangover. My head’s pounding and I’m feeling I must look like one of the freshman loose in the hallway. A custodian has his back to me cleaning windows. I ask him where the lab is and he turns, wipes his nose on me before pulling me to the lab. How could I know this guy had heard about the ‘Hogger Contest’?

Coronavirus + Capitalism = Profits

Markets going ... going ... down but these stocks, CLX & MMM are up ... up . . . and away. Yes! On a day when the market is down 496 points.

Dare Ya Once

When life got really complicated. PSTD and all its savage implications.

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Coronavirus - Factory Output = Less Global Warming

You see the haze over China has disappeared? 

Bad Day for Our Hero's

Ya see that LA's Finest were snapping photo's of Kobe and his 13 year old daughter in death? Not only that, one deputy was showing off his photos in a bar. Kinda makes ya wonder what kinda day LA's Degenerates had.

Human Race - Coronavirus = Increased Awareness

Bill Gates has been warning of disease potential for what seems like forever. Now that it is a reality and over two thousand people have lost their life to this organism, perhaps we are at a moment of discovery. The Coronavirus has a mortality factor of 2% vs 10 to 20% for the Spanish Flu. 

The Last Gargoyle - Installment #2

     I didn’t see it coming ‘til it was too late. He wiped his nose on my sleeve. Not acceptable in my world. Oh nobody seen him do it but they sure heard me do it. I called him a thing or two. I just so happen to pack a thing called a temper, not that that is an excuse or anything. Boy, let me tell you I felt like I got it all wrong in no time flat. It was like everyone thought I should be kind and understanding and not defend myself at all. Well, I stared down the simpleton, realizing I couldn’t hate him anymore even if I tried really hard. He was grinning but not over anything he’d just did. Grinning seemed to be his preferred manner. The whole thing just bugged me enough to not go to class. I mean I’m not going to sit in class watching snot dry on my sleeve. I got pointed in the direction of my van but flopped down on the first bench I passed. I sat tight, visualizing the act of vengeance that went from a slap to mowing down nitwits with my van. The pint of vodka came in handy. It helped fuel thoughts of vengeance which lifted my spirits. Before I got going again I had decided I would avenge this great wrong. How this was to be done I did not know.

One Republican Once said . . . A House Divided Can't Stand

Sure looks like the Democratic House is divided.

Coronavirus - Wild Animal Food Source = A Chance for Endangered Animals

Wow, a virus that could save the Pangolin. This is an animal that is considered a delicacy in China. It is on its way to extinction. Well I guess the Chinese have instituted a ban on eating wild animals because of disease potential.

Coronavirus - Military Buildup = Cooperation

Wow, a virus that could end Wars! We'll have to quit with the military posturing long enough to find a cure.

Harvey Weinstein

One wonders what happens to those 'Less Wealthy' who are headed to Rikers Island and have a Panic Attack. Are the Taxpayers on the hook for Harvey's hospital stay? Common Sense is all gone bye-bye.

A Blonde in Rome

A law in ancient Rome required prostitutes to wear yellow wigs so they were easier to spot. This way women wouldn't be wrongfully propositioned. One has to wonder what happened to the peace of mind of naturally occurring blondes running around Rome.